The Meandering Mind of a Christian Woman

            Have you ever experienced something so wonderful that you couldn’t decide whether to share it with the world or to hoard it for yourself? It is as if giving it away will somehow lessen the experience. I frequently feel that way about my relationship with God, it is intensely personal, especially my prayers. Praying allows me to spill it all before the Lord. I don’t want to spill it all with another human being. You see, God keeps my secrets, he cherishes my praise and he readily forgives my sins.             There are some moments too special, you can share them with another but they really don’t get it because it isn’t the same as being there. You know how it goes; trying to share a funny story and you’re laughing so hard, you finally get the story out and your friend just grins. Then you say, “I guess you had to be there.” But when I share with God it is so deep and intimate becaus...

            My favorite Christmas carol is “Oh Come Let Us Adore Him” just the word ‘adore’ has so much feeling in it. It means to love and respect someone deeply; worship, venerate . And the melody of the refrain is also in the right key for me (don’t ask me what that key is; I just know I can hit the notes.) When I give it my full voice, I truly feel the spirit of worship deep in my being.             If I could bottle that feeling and break it out whenever I’m just not feeling my faith, it would be so awesome. Yet, I wonder if it would lose its zest were I to have access to it all the time? Would it become routine? Would it be like a steady diet of rich foods? That would not be so good. In the book of Daniel, we read about Daniel and his friends becoming part of the king’s chosen. He was to be fed food from the king’s table, rich foods; but he asked for special favor to eat a diet of vegeta...

                It is the time of year when Christians reflect on the birth of Christ. For me, Luke chapter 2 is as good as it gets, Linus from the Charlie Brown Christmas special thought so too as he quoted from the chapter. Having been to Bethlehem and viewed the Shepherd’s Field as well as a manger representation it goes even deeper.                 The shepherds field is uneven and rocky, there really isn’t much to protect one from the wind. Certainly, the shepherds were grubby, being a shepherd in those days was not the most respected of positions either. Yet, God chose this sampling of humankind to be the first to see His son. The appearance of the heavenly host was the most majestic thing about Jesus’ birth, but they didn’t appear to Mary and Joseph, they appeared to shepherds! Everything else was humble to the extreme. Born of a virgin, translation- unmarrie...

Have you ever heard the argument; how can a loving God send people to hell? These people don’t realize that it isn’t God ‘sending’ them anywhere, it is their choice, heaven is always an option. To be perfectly honest for a long time I struggled to refute that argument. Because I also fell for that rhetoric. In reality going to hell is a choice just like heaven is. Believing in Jesus, the son of God, and that he lived, died and lives again to cover our sin is the criteria for going to heaven (very simplified). We accept and expect criteria for earthly things; why is it so difficult to place heaven and hell in the same framework? One expects that to go to a fitness center or a price club, a membership fee and identification as a member will be required; but doesn’t expect that there are criteria for heaven? Paradise? I suppose it’s hard to accept that Jesus already paid the membership fee. People feel that they have to do something on a grand scale to earn the privilege. Perhaps the...

            I have heard that the closer we are to God the harder Satan fights to pull us away. It occurs to me that perhaps America is fighting to get closer to God because it sure feels like Satan is doing his hardest to pull us away. I have the impression that the voices of nonbelievers are being accentuated and the voice of believers is muted. (Don’t get me started on the media) I have seen posts of people saying the prayer doesn’t work. The thing is, we don’t know how many evils are being thwarted because of prayer because those things don’t make the news.             You see, God doesn’t do the glitz and glamour of the world to get our attention. He is a steady, constant, trustworthy, and not going anywhere being. He doesn’t need to do the showy things, as demonstrated to Elijah.             1 Kings 19:11-13 “The Lord said, ‘Go out a...

            Are you like me? Does the media frustrate you, whether liberal or conservative? The bias is everywhere and it causes one to wonder if we ever hear the real story. Why do they choose to promote the news stories that they do? As I write this we have just experienced another mass shooting, yes, that is news. It concerns me however, that it becomes the sole focus and creates a tunnel vision that leads many to the idea that there is nothing good in America. While I am not by any means discounting those who were injured or killed, we, who believe in salvation through Christ should not take part in fear mongering. “Do not fear” is in the bible more than 300 times. It also reminds us that “ in this world you will have trouble…” (John 16:33) but it goes on to say “…But take heart! I have overcome the world.”             A hymn that has often brought me comfort is, I’m but a Stranger Here; He...

            Everyone is a slave to someone or something. We like to think we are free and there is a grain of truth to that freedom, we do have the freedom to choose our master. I once heard that the first thing you think about on waking, will give you insight as to where your heart is.  I have had the occasion of pain being my master on waking and one might say, but you didn’t choose that master. At first blush that is true, but how I choose to allow or disallow the pain to govern my day is my choice. Matthew 6: 20, 21 “But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” … verse 24 goes on to say “No man can serve two masters. Either you will hate one and love the other, or you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.”        ...

            There is a little plaque where I work that says, “What if you only had today what you thanked God for yesterday?” It is a great little reminder.  Many friends on Facebook perform the 30 days of thanks in November, citing different people or things each day for which they are thankful; I too have done that in the past. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, so it is especially appropriate to express our gratitude to God. Considering that God gives us everything, we have much for which to be thankful.             We give thanks for our children, our parents, siblings, friends or maybe the fact that we don’t live close enough to family that we have to spend an entire day together. Of course there is also clothing, food and shelter; you know, the basics. Although these are worthy entities for which to be thankful; there is one really obvious and very important item that doesn’t immediately come ...

            As anyone from the Midwest is aware, the first snow of the season is an exciting adventure. It brings out the lovers and haters of snow. I believe if we could arrange for the snow to only fall in certain places and to leave roads, runways and sidewalks alone, everyone would enjoy it. Snow is beautiful to watch from a window and even to play in for a little while. If the snow is the right texture you can get creative with your snowman and fort building skills. As a child, my siblings and I would spend a lot of time playing the snow, returning inside with woolen mittens caked with mini snowballs, which we place on the heat register to dry so we could go back out in a few hours and do it all again. I will never forget pulling out the bread bags which we would put over our feet and into our boots for waterproofing (yeah, right) and insulation. I have always lived in Northern Illinois and without fail every winter, driving skills of the gener...

            Have you seen the video of a failed trust fall? You know the one where all the friends line up behind a person and she is to trust them to catch her but instead of falling backwards, she falls forward. It makes me laugh when I see it and then scratch my head in wonder how anyone could be so foolish.             It dawned on me today that Christians actually do this figuratively quite frequently. We say we trust God but when he puts us in a position we aren’t comfortable with we don’t trust him, we fall forward on our faces. The story that comes to mind is Jonah; talk about a trust fall failure! The book of Jonah begins with; “The word of the Lord came to Jonah.” That is a serious directive and what does Jonah do? The exact opposite of what God asked him to do, God said Ninevah and Jonah said Tarshish. As one continues to read the book we see how God eventually gets His way. Ninevah n...

            There seems to be a misperception that social media is blowing way out of proportion. People believe that Christians really care or get offended by a coffee cup. Say it isn’t so! Now, I am not a coffee drinker so it couldn’t be any lower on my list of concerns. I had no idea people took these things so seriously. I also hear people say that we “can’t” say Merry Christmas and this simply isn’t true. We can wish people Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah, Joyous Kwanza or the generic Happy Holiday; it is the person behind the phrase that matters. Love your neighbor as yourself.             Perhaps you have met someone who did get offended by your greeting; I have not. I believe that our responsibility is to share the joy of the season and not be caught up in the grumbling consumerism that has invaded the season. I have blogged about this before, it is sort of my soap box. We must rejoice an...

            So, I am in need of surgery on my knee, it was initially planned for early in December and has been pushed back to the week of Christmas. On the one hand I am looking forward to having the surgery done but the wait time is bothersome. It gives me more time to think about what is coming. Expectation can be exhilarating or frustrating but waiting is draining and exhausting. It was pointed out in church this morning that Jesus had foreknowledge of the life he would have here on earth.             Let’s put that in perspective. Look back on the first 20 years of your life. How many people did you cross in that time span that pushed your buttons and you had enough of them and cut off ties or at the very least wanted to cut off ties. How often did you scoff at others who were perhaps slower than you mentally or physically? Maybe you were bullied and had vengeful ideas about your tormentor....

            The last few days have been scattered for lack of a better word. I feel like I am in a world of shiny things that continually distract me. Some distractions are worthy like helping a friend in need. Other distractions not so much. It has been sort of like a week for celebrating Murphy’s Law, things that could go wrong, did. Mind you, nothing that went wrong was truly devastating, just frustrating. Even though these frustrations were minor they got into my head and festered a bit. I found myself with difficulty concentrating on things including my prayers.             My prayers tend to be all day conversations with God anyway but this week the interruptions in conversation were lasting longer than normal. When I struggle in this manner my tactic is usually to remember and recall any bible verses I know and recite them to myself.  It is a way to center myself. I found it difficul...

            When you were younger did you have different categories of friends? Perhaps there were one or two who were safe to introduce to your parents, maybe a few others that could be around once in a while and then there were the dangerous friends. The dangerous ones weren’t really bad; maybe their language was off color or they were school truants. Still, you were sure if your parents met them they’d be less than pleased with your choice of friends. We all want to please our parents, there is something about having their approval that is at the root of many counselors’ careers.             I did not have a posse of friends as a kid, it’s okay. I don’t want to think about what I have or don’t have, it is more important to consider who I am and how will I conduct myself. Recently, I have been considering what kind of friend I am and the kind of friend I want to be. I’ve decided I want to be t...

            I’m guessing you may have heard the following from an unchurched friend before; “If I set foot in the church the roof will fall in.” We tend to chuckle along because of the uncomfortable situation and let the topic die. I heard a song today (I did not catch the artist, I’m sorry) the refrain said, “there are no strangers, no outcast and God has no orphans.” It is important to remind people that the church on earth is comprised of sinful human beings; people with faults just like theirs. People prone to make mistakes, it happens.             I thought of my favorite Psalm 139 – verses 7-10 “ Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold m...

            Yesterday, I pointed out that Jesus did not condemn the sinful but I think it is important to point out that he did say, “Go, and sin no more.” It is pretty easy to overlook that caveat; after all, we know that he will forgive us. The word ‘repent’ is translated to turn from, when we repent our sin we should turn from it, important, yes. The part we forget is that when we do turn from sin, we turn to God.  He doesn’t just expect us to do it on our own.             The challenge can be that we are turning from something tangible, like drugs, pornography, gluttony and so on, to something spiritual. We cannot physically grasp something to pull ourselves from sin. We have to walk away from it with trust and faith that God will provide.             1 Corinthians 10:13 “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to m...

           I was at the grocery store today and saw a few people I know. However, a couple of them were so focused on their shopping they never saw me even though they appeared to look straight at me. I suppose we all get that focused sometimes. As I drove home I pondered how much of my life I live with tunnel vision. I can certainly get pretty focused, just ask my kids when I am focused on something and they attempt to talk to me.             Problems can do that to us. We get to a place where that is all we can see. There is nothing else, just this problem looming all around us. But if we step back we can see a bigger picture, we can see the bright spots in the midst of trouble. We get stronger, we see things we never saw before, we open our eyes to see blessings. I’ve always heard that we learn best from our mistakes and to a certain extent that is true. I know in my career mistakes stick with me ...

            When Elsa and I go for our walks, due to her age, I allow her to lead and decide how fast and far we will go. She does, however, possess the annoying habit of quite suddenly and without warning come to a dead stop directly in front of me. If I am not paying attention, I will stumble and fall.             Last week, my laptop did a very similar move and came to a dead stop giving me a black screen and only a black screen. So many emotions coursed through me as I stared at the screen; anger, heartache, devastation to name a few. I keep my writings and other documents for volunteer work that I do that are particularly important to me. I walked away from it and stressed about it for a bit. Then I prayed and went to bed. After work the following day I decided to see if I could change the video card (as recommended by friends) so I unplugged it, removed the battery ...

            I believe autumn is my favorite season. The cooling of a steamy, hot summer, no need for air conditioning, and the apple cinnamon candles are all good reasons to enjoy fall. My most beloved aspect though is the color. Living my life in the Midwest watching the leaves change color has always been a fascination. The thing is, once the leaves reach their bold color, they die and fall off the tree; to quote Bon Jovi they “go out in a blaze of glory.” In my overactive imagination, that is how see the Christian life and its mortal end.             Being a nurse, I have witnessed many deaths over the years. Some were quite peaceful and others rather distressing. I doubt that anyone else would say death is a blaze of glory, I would add, on this side of the event. Yet, for the Christian, imagine the blaze of glory awaiting us! I also had the privilege to witness the de...