The Meandering Mind of a Christian Woman

              I was walking with my good friend Patti this morning as we do most Saturdays, and we were discussing dependance on God versus a bank account when from out of my coat pocket my phone speaks and says, “I don’t understand.” In the moment it made us chuckle, but it is so appropriate because the phone (a worldly item) can’t understand that kind of faith. The world doesn’t understand that kind of faith. I have often heard stories of men and women of faith totally dependent on God, prayers being answered in supernatural ways at the very last minute. (Read up on George Mueller who ran an orphanage depending entirely on God). I desire that type of faith because try as I might, at times I still lean on my bank accounts and fear can creep in when my funds are low.             There is no way to completely understand the love of God, His ways are incomprehensible to the...

              As a young person, I was fond of painting, not great at it but reasonable. I set it aside when I fell in love and got married. In these days of isolation I needed to find some other ways to occupy myself other than baking and decided to get back to my paint brushes.   To get used to handling the brushes again I got myself a paint by number,             If you have never tried one of these let me give you a little insight. You receive a canvas with an image divided up into numbered areas and little pots of paint with corresponding numbers. Then you begin a sort of scavenger hunt trying to fill in all the spots of a particular number. Sounds simple enough, however some of these areas are so tiny they are easily overlooked. The tiny spots are important though, they give that little flourish that can draw the eye or round out an object.    ...

                  Everyone wants to be heard, but no one wants to listen. It happens all the time, in the home, at work, the city, the state, the nation and internationally. We all want to make our point, but we don’t listen to the opposite point of view. We’ve already made up our mind on a topic and we aren’t going to budge.                 All the divisiveness in our country is so frustrating. What would happen if we could sit at a table with others who see things differently than we do and we listened? Hearing and listening are completely different. We need to listen to understand yet how often are we formulating our response before we have even heard completely what the other person is saying? I know I am guilty of this.                 True listening a...

            If you know me, you know I avoid politics and controversy. I avoid conflict. I am a coward. This is just one example of white privilege. I can afford to never step into the fray because I’m not particularly affected by it on a personal level. I don’t want to be a coward, I want to help promote justice for all people, including and especially, people of color. I have prayed about what I can do to effect change and my power lies in my writings. It is a small power to be sure, but I must use what I can to promote liberty and justice for all.             I was raised in a white town; we did not have a black family in our town until I was about 14 years old. Racist jokes were common in my house, even applauded at times. I was taught that people of color could not be trusted, they were different somehow. When that first black family did move to town, I wanted to be f...

            Marking time; today is 9/11 a date that invokes tragic memories in the heart of every American who was alive eighteen years ago. Most of know exactly where we were when we heard the news; I was sitting at an intersection waiting for a left turn signal. There is something about tragedy that gets embossed on ones’ mind. When I consider the events of my life, I can recall intimate details that I am unable to at any other time. I must dig in my mind to recall what I had for lunch two days ago, but I remember the smell of fresh paint in my house 46 years ago when we received the call my brother had been killed in an accident.             I have been contemplating what we humans do on anniversaries of events. We mark time. But we also mark time for inconsequential days. How many days until the weekend, until vacation, even how many hours until the end of my shift? We...

            When I was a pre-teen, I was given my eldest brother’s bible, he had been killed in an electrocution accident. I ran my fingers over the gold embossed letters of his name lovingly.   I recall being fascinated by the fact it was a red-letter bible, meaning that the words of Christ were in red. I opened the book to this verse: Matthew 7:1,2 “Do not judge or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” I remember feeling as though it was a revelation; a piece of wisdom that could serve me well. It is a verse that frequently passes through my thoughts even now. Judging is something with which I struggle. It just seems to happen automatically; I try not to speak my judgments out loud, but God knows the judgments I make even in my mind.             There is a big diff...

            I just spent my morning waiting in an auto care shop for maintenance to be completed on my vehicle. I have spent the last couple months ignoring a warning light on my dashboard and decided it was time to investigate it. The guy behind the counter approached me a couple times with a new problem and different scenarios of how to manage them.   (It’s situations like this that remind me how much I miss my husband.) At one point the solutions proposed had a price difference of more than a thousand dollars, we went with the less expensive solution first. As they worked on that solution, I prayed fervently that it would work. Fortunately for me, God heard my prayer and answered in the affirmative. The mechanic did say there is the potential the solution is temporary; I will continue praying.             As I left the shop in my smoothly running vehicle, it occurr...