Radiate


I was lying on a hard table, in a cold room, with my upper body exposed and my arms over my head, in order to receive my first radiation treatment. The machine was circling around me making buzzing and whirring noises. Talk about feeling vulnerable. Up on the ceiling is an array of little lights to suggest a star laden sky to give a calming effect. There was nothing painful about this process, yet it was intimidating.

I made the attempt to take myself somewhere else mentally, I watched the little lights flicker and thought of all the stars in the sky and who placed them there. I was reminded that he knew where I was at that moment and I wasn’t there alone. Through all of the insults my body has endured in the last seven months, surgery, chemo, and side effects I have not been alone. Christ understands my suffering and pours out his love for me. I see his love through the people who surround me and support me with prayers and encouragement. It is easy to take these people for granted, but I really don’t want to do that.

So, back to that cold hard table, that will bear my weight 32 more times before I am done. As I prepare to go to treatment today I am making the choice to pray and give thanks, as I go through the rest of my treatments, for each person who has been a blessing to me. The word, radiate, means to emit, exude or diverge. It seems appropriate that as I lay there I can radiate God’s love to others through my prayers. . I wonder if I will have enough time to remember everyone? God bless you!
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  1. AnonymousJuly 26, 2013 at 10:12 AM

    Jodi, I've been too caught up lately to read your blog. I'm very thankful that today I stopped being "busy" and read this. As always, well said.
    Thank you.
    Kelli

    ReplyDelete

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