The Meandering Mind of a Christian Woman

            When I wake, one of the first things I do is say, “Good morning God!” Some days are more enthusiastic than others. When I greet another human being, I usually follow that greeting with, “how are you?” This morning it occurred to me that I don’t ask God how he is. I have been contemplating this idea, how are you God? Obviously, given his attributes of omnipotence, omnipresence and omniscience it is easy to follow the train of thought that he has everything in check. Despite that; I think of him in human terms and I can’t help but feel he is; not mad but disappointed (cringe). When he looks at creation, like a parent gazing on the wreckage of a kid’s toy room, wouldn’t there be disappointment?             As I contemplated that, my meandering mind led me to consider guilt. The guilt that leads to the disappointment of others. Every culture I have known lays claim to guilt; Lutheran guilt, Catholic guilt, Jewish guilt, Italian guilt and so on. Truth be told, we’re all guil

            This is my least favorite time of year for a handful of reasons. Ten years ago we learned that my husband and love of my life was dying of pancreatic cancer. Seven years ago, my middle daughter was confined to a wheelchair and dependent on others for her care and we learned that she has MS. Six years ago I had started chemotherapy for my own breast cancer. These were all significant challenges and even now, they affect me deeply. The memories flood my mind frequently this time of year and Facebook memories confront me too. Human nature is to fall into the pit of negative emotions.             Yet, here I am, still standing, still living and still believing that God has a plan for me. “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 I lean on this verse more often than I can count. God has been good to me, he has given people who love and care about me and my girls. He has restored the health of my daughter and myself. Th